You can stop your kids from whining,
begging and going wild for no particular reason, if you follow some tips from experts
in education and trusted parenting sources. We should know our
enemy well enough to defeat it. In
this case, temper tantrums are the enemy. They are very common in kids aged one
to four.
More than half of kids let their frustration
out at least once a week or more often. Why do they do it? They can whine to
get a new toy, an extra candy or some other unhealthy snack or maybe they just
want your attention or our testing limits. Yes, they have no idea what limits are.
But, they can still figure out that crying loudly can bring them a treat. So, why
not do it by the time they turn three or four? Kids have much better language
skills than babies of course.
But, their vocabulary is still not advanced
enough to describe everything they feel. So, what can you do to prevent your kids from going crazy now and then?? First,
make your child feel comfortable as we already know kids often whine for a
reason and you can neutralize that reason. Before going out shopping or
wherever you have to go with your little one, make sure they are
prepared for it; which means they
had enough sleep, enough food and you have everything they might need, with you.
Next, let your child choose. According to medical reference, it is a good idea to let your child choose. We are not talking about making life defining decisions like which house to move in or where to go on vacation. Start with little things which will make him or her feel like they are in control. Control also means responsibility. They will of course not know it just now. But, they will see how their choices affect what they do and how they feel.
You can also go smart about it and
direct your child where you want them to be. Just give them an alternative
where both options are good. For example, you can wake them up in the morning
and offer to choose if they want to get dressed first or brush their teeth. They
will have to do both eventually. But, this way they will feel like they are
given some choice.
Find
out what's really bothering your kid.
This is especially
important for kids under
two-and-a-half. At this age, they have a vocabulary of around 50 words and can't
build a sentence out of them. But, they still have cravings, thoughts and wishes.
They can't just announce to you. You don't get the message. They don't get the
answer. So, what do they do?
Try
to create a sign language your kid
will understand and remember. Teach them to show basic words like food, milk,
sleep and so on. It can work miracles.
Distract
your little one! You know how when you feel sad or something
is bothering you. Going out with friends or reading a book can help you set
your mind on other things and it gets better. Your child will unlikely be getting
over a breakup or a job loss. But, they have their own concerns.
As we know, when you feel danger is
coming, the baby's face is reddening or they are giving other signs of a
tantrum to follow. Distract them!! Let's go for a walk, how about we read your
favorite book. These are all great ways to divert your child's fleeting
attention. Even telling a little joke or making a funny face can help.
Become a good teacher for your kid! Do you remember your
favorite teacher? How about you
become that favorite teacher for your own kid? First of all, stop being angry
at them for throwing tantrums. A great teacher won't be mad at you for not
being good at physics right?
Second, teach your little one to
overcome frustration. Show them that drawing, reading a book or cuddling with
their favorite toy can help and make sure you teach them words are much better
heard and understood than screaming. Kids really want to do what is right. But,
sometimes they just don't know what that is. Explain your concerns and fears.
Never yell in front of your kid. You
could even make up an angry vocabulary for your child that would be a list of
words to express negative emotions.
Further tips can be found at tips on parenting stubborn children.